She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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