at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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