anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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