why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
her facebook's as public as her vagina
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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