Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Randomize
