you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize