Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
