so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
