When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
