Tell her she can't have a vagina
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
