I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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