I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
