Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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