May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
