im having a threesome with these popsicles
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
don't judge my taste in strippers
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I'm like, not good at living.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
