sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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