Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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