dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
