He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
