Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize