We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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