i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
