I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize