So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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