lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
well I can't set my house on fire every night
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
She bit a glass in half.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize