i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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