This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
