hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
