His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You are a genius and a whore.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize