Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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