My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
