Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
