Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
