his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
