ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Hippo gnu deer
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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