I murdered the dance floor call the cops
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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