Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
We don't watch enough power rangers
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
