I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
