turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize