i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
