Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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