Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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