Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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