How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
