I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
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