i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize