Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
