i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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