what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize