im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
