Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
